The John Holmes CL Valiant Pornovan Project

Hi all,

Finally, its begun. After 4 years of sitting around & being neglected my CL Pano is having its time to shine. It's waited patiently while I repowered my Hemi VG Valiant Coupe, built up a VG Valiant Cop Sedan, VE Valiant Cop Safari Wagon an VF Valiant Sedan, but now it's going to be full steam ahead.

There's a bit of a story behind this. I've wanted a CL van all my life; my Dad worked at Chrysler in SA so I've always been aware of them even when new and although plenty of other cars have come and gone, this was always 'the' project. Since doing some Custom Van stuff for Street Machine mag my motivation's quadrupled and its really reignited the dream I had as a kid in the 80's; to be cruising around tailgate up and with Australian Crawl crackling from the wireless... Not to mention the gear drive, crushed velvet pentastar archway and working sidepipes. I mentioned to my wife that I'm going to take her parking up at Mt Cootha when its done, but she said I better take a towel as I'll be going it alone... Damn..

Here's some more background in the form of a letter I wrote to Custom Vans & Trucks in 1983:



Thankfully some tastes have changed since then, namely 12 slotters and Mack Bulldogs (WTF?) but it'll still have a lot of styling cues I yearned for so badly back then.

So it all started with a basketcase I picked up in Brissy, its a factory 318 4 speed Stellar Blue Sportspack, but it had no motor or box, interior, front panels etc. and is pretty rusty. To get the ball rolling back in 2005 I bought a CL Regal V8 donor car (remember when you could still buy donor cars?, they were the days) which had been rear-ended and subsequently written off. My Dad and I pulled the 318 and 904 and stripped the Regal of as much stuff as we could use to try and help make this a complete Van again.







So basically the build plan for this is new millenium 'Denimachine', not only because that's the look I like, but when you see Val Vans at Shows these days they are more often than not restored Drifters or Sportspacks which look pretty standard. Don't get me wrong I love a clean Val Van but I want to do something different. To that end it will have front and rear spoilers, pentastar side bubble windows, sidepipes, bonnet scoop etc. and have the option of a CM Regal front or fibreglass Trans Am front that I'm grafting to a spare CL nosecone so they can be swapped over with minimal fuss. Here's a mock-up pic as the van sits currently and a snap of the pentastar bubble windows I picked up which I feel are very fitting to a Chrysler Van:





So today I decided to get things moving. To bring you all up to speed, all I have done in the 4 years that I've had it is to piece it together externally as parts and panels have come along. You'll see a lot of stuff from the CL Regal plus better doors and a nosecone that I picked up here and there. As everyone knows, the best thing about having wagons, utes or vans lying around is the amount of crap you can store in them. This was definitely the case with me as anything that needed a home just got jammed in here. So I started by ripping it all out and cleaning out the back. Funnily enough I found heaps of stuff that I thought I had lost (and since bought more of) and managed to bin a lot of stuff as I need to find homes for all this crap now I actually want to build it!





The plenum under the screen is a pile of shite, I've always known it and have a mint donor cut out of a VH sedan to help repair it, but there is so much bog jammed in there that you couldn't actually see the bolts that hold the dash panel in...







Oh, and when I was digging around in the engine bay I found a name and address Dymo taped on the inner guard: David HOLMES from Para Hills in Adelaide. How's the irony of that!! We've been calling this thing the John Holmes Pornovan for so long!! Its a sign I tell you! I'm going to try and chase this bloke up too, maybe he'll have some pics of it in its prime.

I'll try and get the crayons out in the next couple of days and attempt to draw a couple of concept pics of how I want it to look which might make it all clearer..

This is going to take a couple of years so bare with me...

have fun

Simo

What a great read Simo.
You were pretty close with the idea's you had back then, that you have now.
It'll look a treat when finished.
Keep up the great work.

Thanks Agro, I can't wait to get this project really moving along!

I had a couple of spare hours this arvo so pulled out the dash frame to have a better look at what the rust situation is like. For starters, when your dash frame is this rusty it's a good sign that there's problems further up top!







Once I'd had enough of rusty plenums I decided to have a bit of fun and mock up the fibreglass front. I picked up a pretty hammered Carring front to suit a HQ that is exactly the same as the one I bought quite a while back but this ones had a hard life and there is a bit of damage here and there. To that end I don't mind cutting it up! Whereas most fibreglass fronts replace the complete original nosecone on say a HQ, I want to attach the fibreglass directly to a 2nd CL nosecone to make rego easier, enable me to keep some strength there and be able to bolt/unbolt and interchange with a CM Regal front without much drama. I also want to keep the headlights where they are too.







I figured the optimum position was to line the rear of it up with the rear of the CL nosecone so I gradually kept cutting material away until it sat pretty neatly. As you'll see in the pics its not long enough to make it back to the wheelarches so the plan is to extend it rearward and also extend the front spoiler part deeper similar to how I've mocked up my CL spoiler, and I intend to run black headlamp covers to hide the round headlights. I've never been a fan of the really rounded centre of this nose so want to alter it to be more sharp like a Trans Am or even go the Mad Max or XX308 versions. The Photoshop is dodgy but you'll get the drift!!











have fun

Simo

The nosecone's don't look to bad at all.I'd lean towards the Monza front.(But i'm biased towards those nosecones. )

Yea Simo, look, that roof spoiler dosnt look any good on your van, so if you send it to me I'll, Um, dispose of it for you.


Just kidding, I think the CL is gunna be white hot when finished, Very rare on the van scene. plus ive got a soft spot for the ol drifters.

Where's the bulldog going to sit

Probably on the grass,,,,,,,,,,oh hang on,,, you SIT.

You SAID sit.........theres another joke stuffed up through bad typing

Here's Simo's dog, sitting on my desk......

All I can say was that I loved trucks as a kid too...

have fun

Simo

this is going to be the coolest Drifter in Aussie history.... ! go for it man.

mopar themed bubble windows... sweet as.
great thread...
love the published letter too.

keep up the great work Simon

Thanks folks, I'm so stoked to be finally building this, I can't wait to get it on the road! Hey Ramble, the Holden stuff is so close a fit for the Valiant roofs, but I'm modifying spoilers that have already had hard lives. There's a guy in Bris who stills makes new roof spoilers to suit HD-WB vans and he is keen to start re-popping trans am and other nosecones when he can get ones to mould off; he's going to do a Carring styled HQ front and also an Arcadipane Valiant front I have here as well. Its a place called 'Raider Fibreglass' at Kippa Ring north of Bris. I'll grab some contact details for anyone that's interested.

Harrison Holden Spares are also remaking bubble windows to suit anything, if anyone is chasing windows especially in certain colours etc.

Thanks

Simo

Go for it Simon, As someone who once owned a Valiant (wagin not van) in the early 80"s and built a full custom front from scratch I can honestly say there are nto many Chryslers around with custom nose cones. The CL front looks Fantastic, but, hey any one can bolt on stuff.

hemi4bbl wrote:There's a guy in Bris who stills makes new roof spoilers to suit HD-WB vans and he is keen to start re-popping trans am and other nosecones when he can get ones to mould off; I'll grab some contact details for anyone that's interested.

Could be interested in a Monza or Meteor nosecone (depends what you read in old ads as to which one is which).