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Joke of the day.

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Todays generation is known as Gen. Y

Post by Ramble on 19/4/2010, 3:12 am

And I always thought it was because they say....
Y should I get a job?
Y should I leave home and find my own place?
Y should I get a car when I can borrow yours?
Y should I clean my room?
Y should I wash and iron my own clothes?
Y should I buy any food?
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by highwaymenace on 19/4/2010, 4:34 am

so true

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The Hypnotisit

Post by Ramble on 24/4/2010, 2:12 am

I felt sorry for the hypnotist I saw last night.

He hypnotised seven men then dropped the microphone on his foot and yelled, F#&k me!!
.what happened next, will haunt me forever!!
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by kyles on 26/4/2010, 1:35 pm

karma sutra possition 57: The pirate....

begin in normal doggy possition.
just before you are ready to climax , pull out then spit on her back so she belives you are finished.
when she turns around , let your load loose in her face to shock and amaze her.

known as 'the pirate' because she will innevitably place one hand over her eye and say "ARRRGH!"

pirat
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The Pen1s Poem

Post by mazdragon on 27/4/2010, 1:58 pm

My nookie days are over,
My pilot light is out.
What used to be my sex appeal,
Is now my water spout.
Time was when, on its own accord,
>From my trousers it would spring.
But now I've got a full time job,
To find the &*&(&%$ thing.
It used to be embarrassing,
The way it would behave.
For every single morning,
It would stand and watch me shave.
Now as old age approaches,
It sure gives me the blues.
To see it hang its little head,
And watch me tie my shoes!!
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by Monk on 28/4/2010, 1:28 pm

A Black baby is given a set of wings by god
He Asks , God does this mean lm an angel ?
God laughs, Of course not you silly black bastard,


youre a blowfly
Laughing
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Air travel

Post by Ramble on 4/5/2010, 10:55 am

Shortly after a British Airways flight had reached its cruising altitude, the captain announced: 'Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain.Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London Heathrow to Toronto . The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth uneventful flight. So sit back,relax and...... OH, MY GOD !'

Silence followed!

Some moments later the captain came back on the intercom. 'Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry if I scared you . While I was talking to you, a flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!'

One Irish passenger yelled...

'For f*#k's sake ...... you should see the Back of mine!!!'
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My wife, 5 horses

Post by Ramble on 4/5/2010, 10:57 am

This is mythical and deep... truly beautiful...





A man asked an American Indian what was his wife's name.

He replied.... "She called Five Horses".


The man said, "That's an unusual name for your wife.

What does it mean?"


The Old Indian answered, "It old Indian Name. It mean .. . .



. . . NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG!"
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by highwaymenace on 4/5/2010, 11:40 am

so that means Dorothy in Indian means 5 horses,, cool thanks for sorting that out for me Geoff.

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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by Ramble on 5/5/2010, 8:32 am

Not touching that one Shocked
My wife must be 10 horses then. No (looking nervously over my shoulder)
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A very sad Mothers day

Post by Ramble on 8/5/2010, 9:45 am



Happy Mothers day to all the MUMs out there.
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by Crackers on 8/5/2010, 11:13 am

Now thats funny. Laughing
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by Ramble on 8/5/2010, 12:01 pm

Yeah,,its a pretty good YOKE......HAHAHAHAHAHA Very Happy I know, Iam sad
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by mazdragon on 11/5/2010, 5:31 am

yes, u are all sad and just remember, that 5 horses is also the mother of your children and can withhold sex till further notice ..... Twisted Evil be careful what you say... us girls talk!
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by Philg on 11/5/2010, 12:30 pm

when do girls not talk? Suspect
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by kyles on 11/5/2010, 1:37 pm

good call!
i know i should be taking the girls side here but dude , that was my first real laugh all day!
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by Ramble on 11/5/2010, 3:07 pm

mazdragon wrote: be careful what you say... us girls talk!

And talk and talk and talk and talk and taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by mazdragon on 12/5/2010, 5:04 am

ever listened in on a guys conversation???? it's amazing what they'll talk about.... and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk..... lol!
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by kyles on 12/5/2010, 1:50 pm

they dont talk about us do they????.......... Shocked
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by Ramble on 13/5/2010, 8:47 am

kyles wrote:they dont talk about us do they????.......... Shocked

Talk?..I could write a book Mad
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by mazdragon on 13/5/2010, 12:07 pm

why waste paper when you can talk..... lol!
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by Ramble on 14/5/2010, 6:17 am

Apple announced today that it has developed a breast implant that can store and play music.



The new iTitt will cost from $499 to $699, depending on cup and speaker size. This is considered a major social breakthrough because women are always complaining
about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.
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this ones a bit lame but the best i got at the moment

Post by Ramble on 17/5/2010, 3:29 pm

Penguins



Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica - where do they go ?

Wonder no more ! ! !

It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life.

The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life, as well as maintaining a form of compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life..

If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird
to be rolled into and buried.


The male penguins then gather in a circle around the fresh grave and sing:

"Freeze a jolly good fellow"
"Freeze a jolly good fellow."
"


"Then they kick him in the ice hole."
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by Shagginwagon82 on 18/5/2010, 6:21 am

The geniuses at Nikon have developed a brand new, commercially available camera with an ultrasonic shutterspeed for capturing those amazing, once in a lifetime shots.
The developers claim the shutter speed is so fast that it can even catch a photo of a female with her mouth shut.
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Re: Joke of the day.

Post by mazdragon on 18/5/2010, 8:26 am

that was developed years ago... you're way behind.... did you know that the shutter speed is also so fast, it can catch a man not playing with his balls???
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Re: Joke of the day.

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